Sleeping with one eye OPEN

 

With me, it’s either black or white. There is no gray.  In book lingo, that translates into either I love, love, love what I’m currently reading, or I wouldn’t even stoop to use this volume as a doorstop.

This time it’s a homerun hit right out of the happy reading ballpark.

11/22/63 is Stephen King’s back-in-time historical thriller.  I’m not a big Stephen Kind fan because he’s too, well, scary for me.

But history, yep, I’m hooked.

The premise of  the book:

On November 22, 1963, three shots rang out in Dallas, President Kennedy died, and the world changed.

What if you could change it back?

On the surface, one would think what a wonderful idea the preventing of  a national tragedy.

But once our hero, Jake, begins dabbling in “fixing” what’s wrong with the past, will it create even worse unforeseen consequences?

Does Jake accomplish his mission and prevent the JFK assassination?  Does he spend the remainder of his life in prison?  Does he ever return to the present or spend his life in idyllic, small town Texas with his emotionally damaged girlfriend Sadie?

This award-winning bestseller packs 849 pages of intrigue and when I finished it, I still wanted more.

Mid-Life Crisis

I’m going through a mid -life reading crisis.

It seems that nothing holds my interest after the first 100 pages.

They might all be  worthy, but I’m not the least bit interested in 50 Shades of Grey, the latest vampire saga, the newest Barack Obama biography, a western, a romance, a book on how to up my IQ or rearrange my closets.

At 56 have I done and seen it all?

Have I become jaded?

Am I a book snob?

Must I immerse myself in William Faulkner or Thackeray?

Has my world become so inundated with ebooks, magazines, Facebook, Twitter, to the point that carrying a book home of any genre has become obsolete in my happy little corner of the world? And am I only 1 in millions  suffering this malady? Is the demise of the library at hand?

In a word:  no.

Once upon a time, I thought I had all the time in the world and if I began a book, I was determined I would read every word.

Now I realize there is only so much time and so many books so I want to choose carefully.

The book Goin’ Someplace Special by McKissack is worthy.

Um, yes, it’s a children’s book.

I can identify with Goin’ Someplace Special.

As a too-skinny, stringy haired, myopic adolescent misfit, the library was my refuge.  It was a safe requiem from some very bad mojo on the horizon.

Go take a look at this book, and pass it’s message on to your children’s children.

Hey, it’s much cheaper than a bright red convertible, and will last longer, too.

Guess who's Coming to Dinner!

Guess who’s coming to Dinner!

If it’s quirky, and it’s on our library shelves, it’s going home with me.

Imagine my surprise while innocently strolling through the stacks and blundering into the book, Tattoo A Banana And Other Ways To Turn Anything And Everything Into Art by Phil Hansen.  The cover depicts a naked man, yes, tattoed on a banana.

This book had me from the commonsense disclaimer  which instructs, “although it may be tempting to eat your art, don’t.”

What’s not to love in this book?

There’s the section on The Devil Wears Non-Recyclables, or fun with plastic grocery bags.  You don’t want to miss the chapter on Creative Shapes from Burnt Toast  or my personal fave, Gloorah,  using plastic army men and glue to make art. You will remember those plastic men —those torture devices that your bare foot always encounters while stealthily heading to the kitchen for another bite of  chocolate cake.  You can get groovy with The Eracerist or you might choose to Put Your Rake into it, which encourages the artist in you to “rake” a design or word.

Author Hansen is well-known for his eclectic use of artistic media, using everything from matchsticks to dandelion puffs to work his magic.

Take it home with you.

Most Likely To:

I was destined to pick up the book Most Talkative: Stories from the Front lines of Pop Culture by Andy Cohen.  When I began working in libraries over 2 decades ago, one of my friends said, “ but YOU can’t work in a library!  You talk too much.” 

Our author Cohen definitely talks.  From an early age, he struggled to fit into his family. His mom’s advice was “just humor your dad and go toss the damn ball!”  But it was television that he loved, especially soap operas and Charlie’s Angels.  His passion for all things television led him to a career working as a producer and creating shows.   

I’m not going to pretend to be a big fan of television, but I did get a kick out of the author’s insider—if irreverent-- views of popular shows.  He got his first big break when he clinched an interview with his all-time favorite TV  personality, the much-married Erica Kane.  In relating his lunch experience with his idol Susan Lucci  he said,  “I imagined little cartoon birds fluttering down to pick up the hem of her mink coat so it didn’t drag on the ground.”

The book rambles around discussing “shirtless Tuesdays” on the set of 48 hours and slogans of “I love Botox” from the stars of The  Real Housewives Of Orange County. By the closing chapters, the reader happily buys into Cohen’s statement when speaking of his  internship at Morning News—“unlike five o’clock Julie, I couldn’t  get enough of the place.  I would have happily lived out of a sleeping bag in the mailroom.”   

He would have, and added another chapter to the book.

Mirror Mirror on the Wall

I was so prepared to hate this book.

Hate, hate, HATE,  because I was ready for it to say all the things that are wrong with women and society—fixations on our body, looks, etc. selling our soul to the devil to be a size zero. “ I HATE THIS BOOK! I HATE IT!” I screamed inwardly as I carried it to the checkout desk. Ahem, and I was checking it out, why????

And so began my fickle relationship with the book Six weeks to OMG—get skinnier than all your friends by Venice A. Fulton

I opened the book and within 30 minutes I was being sucked into it like a sweet vanilla milkshake through a red straw.

I was surprised. Mesmerized. The text was easily, effortless whipped-cream readable and entertaining.

It was also chock full of  easy to remember cues on how to conquer your weight issues, for example: POM=Period of Movement with entire sections devoted to “how to use your pom poms.”  Delicious!

And, because I AM human, since his philosophy AGREES with things I already hold to be true, perhaps he is NOT the devil!  “Quick fixes don’t work, but the right quick improvements can lead to permanent weight loss.  No one is born fat, or destined to have cellulite,” so promises the author. Quick fixes—well 6 weeks is pretty quick if you ask me.

Whether it’s discussing  the difference in eating a banana with green spots and one with Leopard spots or how to START acting like a hottie, the topic is mouth-smacking tasty.  

Who is this guy anyway?  He’s an expert in nutrititon and exercise physiology who has dedicated himself to helping his high profile clientele keep their bodies fit and healthy.  OK, so he’s not God so I’m sure he doesn’t know everything, But this is a  pretty good  read.

And because he was so blunt , I actually LIKED HIM:

Drugs? No.

Complicated diets? No.

Anorexia? No.

Throwing up? No.

Exercising 20 hours a day? No.

By the time I read the mouth-watering  section “The Truth About Cellulite Cures,” I was hooked.  By the way, here’s the spoiler, according to Mr. Fulton :  cellulite cures don’t work.

Lull me to sleep, and no one gets hurt!

It will likely never win a Nobel Prize for great literature.

But when I picked up Fern Michael’s Southern Comfort I was not looking for great literature—I was looking for diversion, entertainment, escape!

And that’s what I found.

Detective Tick Kelly has gone AWOL and wound up in a bottle after a tragedy involving his family.  He sobers up, becomes a best-selling author, and finds himself attracted to a beach visitor, Kate, who just happens to be a special agent.  Kate’s biological clock is ticking, her former boss is a bungling idiot, and an abandoned child are all thrown into the mix to keep the reader turning those pages.  Does the talking parrot hold the answers to the area’s human trafficking problem?  Does Tick’s twin brother fall for Kate’s best friend?  Can you stay awake until the last page?

I will admit that the dialog was sometimes, um, too predictable.  As was the plot. But predictable,  is not always a bad thing.  Sometimes I need a story where all the strings are neatly tied and everyone is smiling in the finale.  Sometimes I just need exactly what the title promises:  comfort.

What Happens in Vegas..........

You’d have to be living on the dark side of the moon to not have heard of the hoopla created by E.L. James’ 50 Shades of Grey.

Many of my friends have expressed surprise that the Public Library has multiple copies of this title.

The summary of the book posted on Amazon  goes like this:  “ literature student Anastasia Steele goes to interview young entrepreneur Christian Grey, she encounters a man who is beautiful, brilliant, and intimidating. The unworldly, innocent Ana is startled to realize she wants this man and, despite his enigmatic reserve, finds she is desperate to get close to him. Unable to resist Ana’s quiet beauty, wit, and independent spirit, Grey admits he wants her, too—but on his own terms.”

The book has been called “erotic fiction” which the web defines as fictional stories of human sexual relationships.  Currently, we have 61 holds on our 14 copies.  The book has been banned in some areas, and it remains in high demand.

And what is my point?

The Public Library tries to carry a wide array of reading genres.  Some of the selections on our shelves may not agree with my personal beliefs—or your beliefs.  However,  they continue to reside on our shelves due to demand and in the interest of having a balanced collection representing varying viewpoints.  And it is hardly a surprise that many well known classics and bestsellers, including Tom Sawyer, Uncle Tom’s Cabin, The Holy Bible, Diary of Anne Frank, and Ulysses, have been banned in some areas.

And who is reading 50 Shades of Grey?  That is no one’s business except for the cardholder.  Library staff keep no records of what a patron has previously checked out, nor do we reveal what any person has checked out at any time.  Your secrets (and mine) are safe!