That 4 Letter Word

You would have to be living on the dark side of the moon to have not heard of the book The Help.
With all the reviews that have been published what on earth would I have to add to what has already been said about Kathryn Stockett’s destined-to-become-a-classic?
Well, I did grow up in that era. As a child, I can tell you I harbored no feelings of superiority towards any race. A life of luxury would have been as foreign to me as it was to any African American. At 9 years old, I remember going to the home of a little girl in my school class and thinking it was a mansion. Years later, as an adult I had the opportunity to revisit that home and figured I’d realize it was only grandiose because I was young and unsophisticated. Wrong. The home really was the mansion I had remembered. Growing up in rural Arkansas, I was mostly ignorant of race relations.

The thought that has kept me captivated about this story was the time element. The polite “white” society spent their days in the pursuit of club meetings, fashion magazines, and other meaningless drivel. The hired help spent long, backbreaking hours—much longer than our 8 hour workday, slaving away and were not even allowed the courtesy of using the home toilet. All my life I have believed that shortcuts and taking the easy way are ultimately the hard path. This is one of those stories that won’t turn me loose, even though I have turned the last page. I’m still pondering…………

Lessons Learned

“Bank has started callingAnd the wolves are at my doorThree dollars and change at the pumpCost of livin's high and goin' up.”
--Ronnie Dunn from Cost of Livin’

One of my favorite feel good stories is the true life story of millionaire-gone-belly-up, Michael Gates, in How Starbucks Saved my Life. Its subtitle, A Son of Privilege learns to live like everyone else, attests to something I’ve tried to instill in my children for years: Having money does not equal happiness.
Please don’t misunderstand—I am not some Robin Hood persona gleefully enjoying the misfortune of the once rich and famous. What I do enjoy is when the underdog climbs off the porch with a huge, “WOOF!” This book had me rooting for the underdog, hoping that MG Gates would persevere in spite of bankruptcy, advancing age, a failed marriage, and a tumor.
I will admit that some would consider this selection primarily for those interested in training staff on good customer service, but it’s much more. It’s about how we should treat ourselves and others, and isn’t that the true secret for good relationships? Treating others well?
I have thought about the author’s not so subtle views on how adults still struggle with peer pressure. In a passage from the book, our main character muses, “ Be honest, Mike,” I thought, calling myself by my new Starbucks name. “You feel good about what you are doing. Just because you are wearing a green apron rather than a Brooks Brothers suit doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it!”
Sometimes the toughest job we face is being our authentic self.

I love self-help books, and Letting Go of Your Bananas: How to be Successful by letting go of everything Rotten in Your Life by Daniel T. Drubin was an easy choice. The book was not what I expected. Lured into taking this particular book by the cheery bright yellow banana on the cover, I was not prepared for the textbook-like presentation and stilted style of writing. So much for not judging a book by its cover........





But the content--- exceptional!


Based on the premise that monkeys are captured because they reach into a bottle and won't turn loose of their bananas, the focus of the book encourages us to turn loose of the habits, people, and beliefs that have us trapped.





I will admit that I laughed through some of it, not because it is particularly funny, but because the author seemed pretentious, and perhaps the letting go of some of my "bananas" of choice would not be deemed earth shattering. But the book is good enough I recommend taking notes, and more importantly putting those notes in action. Which brings me to a riddle which is apropos for this book: Two frogs are sitting on a log and one jumps off. How many frogs are left on the log? TWO of course! Just deciding to jump off a log and jumping off a log are two different things.

When I was a child, my Grandma would wash my mouth out with soap if she even thought I had said something naughty. I can only imagine what she'd do if she saw what I was currently reading.

Tina Fey's Bossypants--once you tiptoe around the politics--and hurdle over the language-- is just plain ole funny. I picked it up because I wanted something different--something distracting from the present suffocating level of stress that has been my world of late. Well, it certainly distracted me--I almost spewed oatmeal out of my mouth at the breakfast table upon opening it.

I chose this volume as a means of escape, and it certainly transported me to another world. Tina manages to blurt out things that most of us would never admit to even thinking. This is the story of Tina before she was Sarah Palin, before Saturday Night Live, before her hilarious breastfeeding misadventures, before her disastrous honeymoon. She is irreverent, sacralegious, and filthy-mouthed--and just maybe more everywoman than I would care to admit. Disclaimer: DO NOT READ THE LAST 30 PAGES!

Was the level of obscenity in the book necessary? I hear this discussed from time to time. Someone will say, "that movie could have been just as good without all that violence," or, "there was no need for all that sex in that book--it would have been just as good without it." How can one judge? This is Tina's story. Not mine. I suppose she included what she deemed authentic in her world. And I could never judge. After all, I do remember the taste of Grandma's soap....